TEA FOR TWO.

What a whirlwind of a day. Wasn't expecting to wake up to find Brother in his crib covered in vomit at 5:15am. Poor little fella. Got him cleaned up, changed the sheets and switched to a fresh blankie. Nursed him and he fell back asleep until 8:45am. That never happens. My kids are early birds. Any who, went in to get him, only to be greeted this time by the foul smell of a pretty nasty dirty diaper. He seemed in good spirits otherwise. We headed downstairs for breakfast; he was super thirsty for water but not too interested in his toast. I seriously couldn't take the smell any longer, so into the tub he went.

Freshly bathed babies smell waaay better than ones covered in vomit and poop. Just sayin'. We played for a bit and then he went down for his mid-morning nap, which ended up lasting close to two hours.

In the meantime, Nugget and I prepared for our planned Valentine's Day tea party.

Making gingersnap cookies.

We brought her table and chairs down from her playroom, and set up every little girls dream.

She was so excited and waited very patiently while we set up. By the time everything was ready, it was closer to lunch than I thought it would be, so we added some finger sandwiches and fruit to our menu.

The tea set above belonged to my great grandmother. I've had it since I was a young(er), and sadly today was the first time I have ever used it. I wish I had a full set, or at least two, but the one is all I've got.

So, we searched through the local thrift store yesterday hoping to come up with something to compliment it. Not exactly what I was hoping for, but it did the part.

 A little while back while stocking up on fabric at JoAnn's, Nugget came across this sweet little tea print, and really wanted me to make her something with it. I decided on a table cloth and a set of napkins for her play kitchen. Made the perfect addition for today.

We chatted while we ate our snacks and drank our tea, cleaned up a few spills, and enjoyed the girly time together.

Then Nugget decided it wasn't a party until someone sang Happy Birthday and blew out a candle. I thought What the heck. Why not?

She loved it so much, that we did it four times. Thankfully it was a tall candle.

Just as our party was drawing to a close, Brother woke from his nap. He seemed alright, so I fed him some lunch. Bad move. I should have known better. Changed another nasty diaper and some more vomit, and decided it would be best to stay put for the remainder of the day.

We spent the afternoon playing, cuddling, and reading books. So far he's held down crackers and water for dinner. I'm crossing my fingers that he's on the mend, and that the rest of us remain healthy. I hate sickness around here. Especially in the form of vomit.

Ok, enough of that visual. How did you spend your Valentine's day?

FIELD TRIP.

We had the opportunity today to go on a field trip through our ECFE class. It was to see the play Llama Llama Red Pajama at a semi-nearby children's theater.  Nugget has loved this book for quite some time, so I wasted no time in signing us up for the adventure.

I didn't tell her we were going until the day before, because being three and not really having a concept of time, I knew it was better to spring it on her at the last minute.

She was super excited, but not really understanding what a play was either, she was most excited to have her first ride on the big yellow bus. So excited in fact, that she woke up at 6:15 this morning asking if it was time to go. Nick took the day off to stay home with Brother, and after breakfast and a little playtime, we were off.

Um, yes, I had other shoes in mind for this outfit, but sometimes it's just not worth the fight, ya know?

 

She picked a seat close to the front, and we were joined by several familiar faces from our ECFE class. The ride took a little longer than it should have, due to some confused/lost bus drivers, but we ultimately made it in time, with not a minute to spare. We burned through my stash of 'keep her busy on the bus' activities, and resorted to watching home videos on my phone until we arrived.

She was captivated by the show, sitting in my lap and watching intently for almost an hour. She loved it so much that she cried when it was over. She's done this on our last two movie nights at home as well. Not sure what that's all about, but glad she liked it.

We had a little picnic lunch and then it was time to load up on the bus again and head on home. We live really close to the preschool where the bus was picking up and dropping off, so we took the opportunity to walk (or in her case, run) there and back. A good way to burn off some energy after all that sitting.

On our walk/run home, she said to me "Yesterday, let's do that again, and I won't cry this time." Told ya the girls got some issues with the concept of time. Ha. And when tucking her in to bed tonight, she told me 'the show' was her favorite part of day. This is how memories are made, people. So glad to have shared this day with her.

BABIES DON'T KEEP.

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,

Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,

Hang out the washing, make up the bed,

Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?

She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown shiftless as Little Boy Blue,

Lullaby, rockabye, lullaby loo.

Dishes are waiting and bills are past due.

Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo.

The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew

And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo

But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo.

Look! Aren't his eyes the most wonderful hue?

Lullaby, rockabye, lullaby loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow,

But children grow up as I've learned to my sorrow.

So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!

I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

-Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

***

How is it possible that in just six short days, my baby will be ONE?

***

photos of Brother, three days new, taken by my dear friend, Jen

CHANGES.

I feel like I haven't posted in forever. And it's not that the creative juices haven't been flowing. In fact, it's the exact opposite. I've been focusing on a few other things the past week or so, and its been fun. I have some exciting news to share, but not just yet. Nick is helping me work out some details and fine tuning, but then I swear, you'll be the first to know.

One thing I can tell you is that I've made the switch from shooting AV to MANUAL! I don't know what I've been so scared of all this time. It's super easy. And puts me in even more control of my photos, which I love. Next step? Editing. That's in the works too. I've had some super sweet photographers/friends share their knowledge with me, and I've been so grateful. As if I didn't take a gazillion pictures of my kids before, I will now. Except they'll be even better. Awesome.

***

We finally took the plunge and are adding a shower to our upstairs bathroom. Yes, that's right, for the last ninety five years there has only been a claw foot tub upstairs, and a lone shower down in the cold basement. It's just become one of those things that we got used to, doesn't faze us much anymore. Except that its freezing downstairs, so hot, hot showers are a must. The family that we bought this house from lived here for twenty seven years, and had five kids. Three of which were girls. I don't know how they managed to bathe/shower seven people everyday. But anyways, yes, this shower, it's gonna be grand.

One thing that's for sure is that there is no wasted space in our house. There are nooks and crannies and closets everywhere. This is the closet that is off the bathroom. Used primarily as a catch all and necessary storage.

We cleaned it out and it looked like this.



I love this picture. My little ballerina girl twirling around before dance class that morning. Seeing that empty space actually made me really sad. Kinda like someone sucker punched me in the gut. Because it reminded me that there will be a day when we leave this house. When the walls and floors will be bare. I love this house so much. It has been so good to us. I have deeply rooted myself here, and this house is a part of who I am. But we came in here knowing it was a stepping stone, that our real dreams were awaiting elsewhere. That day could come very soon, or it could be many more years down the road. We know that when the time is right, our forever home will find us, and well, we'll be called to go.

Regaining composure...Any who, that room now looks like this.

With plans to soon look like this.



That's one heck of a shower. But come on, six years of showering in the basement. We deserve this.

***

There's not much rhyme or reason to the next photos to come, so I'm just gonna dump 'em, Snippet style.

Awesome hair.

Love him.

Sink baths are back in style as the work goes on upstairs.

Nugget. Excuse me, Ariel. The mermaid love continues.

Library.

Too hungry to wait for lunch.

Nugget and her bff, Avery. Whoops, I mean Ariel and Sleeping Beauty.

For the love of reading. One of life's greatest gifts.

We keep missing our opportunity to go out and make a snowman. This is what you get when you don't jump on the snowfall.

Pathetic? Yes. Awesome to a three year old? Indeed. All that matters.

***

Happy Monday, friends.



CURRENTLY.

I'm needing a little pick me up today, so thought I'd jump on board with Lemonade Makin' Mama and focus on the positives.

I'm....

Currently loving... the snow. It finally feels like winter here, and it's only nearing the end of January. Ha.

Currently reading... US Weekly, Parents, Parenting, and Family Fun. Wish there was time for a novel.

Currently wishing...I could go to craft weekend.

Currently excited about...our upstairs bathroom remodel. I've showered in a cold basement for the last six years. No more, my friends, no more.

Currently missing... time for myself.

Currently trying...to improve my photo skills.

Currently working at...finding a balance for it all.

Currently enjoying...Mother's Milk organic tea with honey.

Currently snacking on...trail mix.

Currently using...Coconut Lemongrass lip balm from here. Its super silky smooth and makes me think of summer.

Currently wearing...yoga pants. Would you expect anything else?

Currently planning...Brother's first birthday party. Only three more weeks!

Currently signing...'Three Little Birds' by Renee and Jeremy.

Currently needing...a new broom. Nick used ours to kill a bat the other night. Apparently we stirred some things up with our bathroom demo this weekend. Nasty.

Currently learning...to sew. This makes me especially happy.

Currently listening to...nothing. Pure silence, except the clicks of my keyboard. Love it.

Currently doing...lots of crafting.

Currently praying for...peace. patience. my family.

Currently dreaming of...a girls date with my Nugget.

What are YOU currently up to?

MOMMY GUILT.

A friend shared this today on Facebook, and it is so dead-on that I just had to pass it along.

You can read it here, but it's that good that I'm copying it below too.

***

Friendly Fire
Written by Glennon Melton

I recently heard a vicious radio debate between women who believe that mothers should stay home and others who believe that mothers should work outside the home. All the debaters were mothers themselves.

As I listened wearily while ducking and dodging the ladies' sucker punches like a cornered boxer, I thought... this is really getting old.

I've been both a "working" and a "stay-at-home" mom so I've experienced both sides of the internal and eternal debate moms endure all day, every day. When I worked outside my house, Mommy Guilt rode shotgun with me each morning, chiding me for dropping off my sick boy at day care instead of keeping him home and for rocking him the night before instead of preparing for work. When I got to work each day Mommy Guilt whispered that a good mom would still be at home with her son and when I returned home she'd insist that a better teacher would have stayed at work longer. When I'd visit girlfriends who stayed home, Mommy Guilt would say "See... this lady's doing it right. Her kids are better off than yours are." And Mommy Guilt certainly had a lot to say when Chase's day care provider admitted that he had taken his first steps while I was working. Every night when I finally got Chase to sleep, finished grading papers, and collapsed into the couch, Mommy Guilt would snuggle up next to me and sweetly say "shouldn't you spend some quality time with your husband instead of checking out?" And finally, before I fell asleep each night, Mommy Guilt would whisper in my ear, "YOU KNOW, THE ONLY WAY YOU'RE GOING TO BE A GOOD MOTHER AND WIFE IS IF YOU QUIT YOUR JOB AND STAY HOME."

And so now I'm a stay-at-home mom. And the thing is that Mommy Guilt stays home with me. These days I experience her less as a drive-by-shooter and more as a constant commentator. Now she sounds like this:

"Did you go to all three of those college classes just so you could clean the kitchen and play Candy Land all day? And how is it that you don't even do those things very well? Can you concentrate on nothing? Look at this mess! A good mom would clean more and play less. Also, a good mom would clean less and play more. Also a good mom would clean more and play more and quit emailing altogether. Additionally, I've been meaning to ask if you're sure you feel comfortable spending so much money when you don't even make any. Moreover, when was the last time you volunteered at Chase's school? What kind of stay at home mom doesn't go to PTA meetings or know how to make lasagna? Furthermore, nobody in this house appreciates you."

My favorite, though, is that when I finally do sit down, concentrate on one of my kids, and read a few books all the way through... instead of saying "Good job!" Mommy Guilt says, "See how happy your daughter is? You're home all day...why don't you do this more often?"

And of course, before I go to sleep every night she whispers... "YOU KNOW, MAYBE YOU'D BE A BETTER MOTHER AND WOMAN IF YOU COULD JUST GET OUT OF THE HOUSE AND WORK."

Mommy Guilt is like that scene from "Liar Liar" in which Jim Carrey enters a bathroom, throws himself against the walls, slams his head into the toilet, and rubs soap into his eyes. When a confused observer asks what on Earth he's doing he says, "I WAS KICKIN' MY ASS! DO YA MIND?"

I understand the act of kicking one's own ass. I do it all the time.

What I don't understand is why some ladies insist on making everything worse by kicking each other's asses.

To the women who argue vehemently that all "good mothers" stay at home: Are you nuts? If you got your way, who would show my daughters that some women actually change out of yoga pants and into scrubs and police uniforms and power suits each day? How would my girls even know that women who don't feel like carrying diaper bags can carry briefcases or stethoscopes instead...or also? How, pray tell, could I tell them with a straight face that they can grow up to be whatever they want to be?

And to the women who argue that all stay home mothers damage women's liberation: Are you nuts? Aren't you causing some damage by suggesting that we all must fit into a category, that women are a cause instead of individuals? And doesn't choosing to spend your limited time and energy attacking "us" set "us" back? But for argument's sake, what if you got your way and every mother was required to work outside of the home? What would that mean to ME? Who would volunteer to lead my son's reading group at school, host his class party, plan his Sunday school lesson or wait with him in the parking lot when I forget to pick him up? Who would watch my daughter while the baby gets her shots? Who would knock on my door and tell me that my keys are still in the front door, the doors to my van are open, and my purse is in the driveway?

And if every woman made the same decision, how would my children learn that sometimes motherhood looks like going to work to put food on the table or stay sane or share your gifts or because you want to work and you've earned that right. And that other times motherhood looks like staying home for all of the exact same reasons.

As far as I can tell, no matter what decision a woman makes, she's offering an invaluable gift to my daughters and me. So I'd like to thank all of you. Because I'm not necessarily trying to raise an executive or a mommy. I'm trying to raise a woman. And there are as many different right ways to be a woman as there are women.

So, angry, debating ladies... here's the thing. My daughter is watching me AND you to learn what it means to be a woman. And I'd like her to learn that a woman's value is determined less by her career choices and more by how she treats other women, in particular, women who are different than she is. I'd like her to learn that her strength is defined by her honesty and her ability to exist in grey areas without succumbing to masking her insecurities with generalizations or accusations. And I'd like her to learn that the only way to be both graceful and powerful is to dance among the endless definitions of the word woman... and to refuse to organize women into categories, to view ideas in black and white, or to choose sides and come out swinging. Because being a woman is not that easy, and it's not that hard.

And speaking of "Liar Liar" - angry debating ladies . . . when you yell about how much peace you have with your decisions, it just doesn't ring true. The thing is, if you're yelling, I don't believe that you've got it all figured out. I don't even believe that YOU believe you've got it all figured out. I think your problem might be that you're as internally conflicted as the rest of us about your choices. But instead of kicking your own ass, you've decided it'd be easier to kick ours.

Which is tempting, but also wrong.

So, maybe instead of tearing each other up, we could each admit that we're a bit torn up about our choices, or lack thereof. And we could offer each other a shoulder or a hand. And then maybe our girls would see what it really means to be a woman.

***

ELEVEN MONTHS.

How did we get here so fast? It is really starting to sink in that my baby will turn one in just a few short weeks. Wow. I remember with Nugget I was so sad at how quickly she was growing and changing. I was excited for each new milestone, but also saddened that is was all happening so fast. For whatever reason, it's been different with Brother. It's true I can't believe he is almost one....I can relive his birth day in my mind like it was yesterday. But I'm also really happy he is growing, changing, and learning new things every day. And I'm here to see every second of it. I think that's the kicker. After Nugget was born, I went back to teaching. I battled myself everyday to find the balance between being a mom and a teacher. I never did find that balance. So now I'm just a Mama. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Here's what's new with Mister Happy at 11 months:

*He signs for 'eat'. Except he forgets the whole hand gesture part and just clicks his tongue. We get it. That's the whole point of it, right, that he can communicate with us?

*Says Mama and Dada, and lots of other various screams and noises to let us know what he wants.

*LOVES to read. Several times a day he will crawl over to one of our baskets and pull out all the books one by one, look at them and turn the pages. He especially likes the touch-and-feel variety and ones that play music. His current favs are Welcome Winter and Baby Beluga.

*He is walking with the help of Mama/Dada and anything he can push around, like a chair or step stool.

*He has just started pointing to things within the last day or two.

*Gives Mama eskimo kisses. Except it's more like banging his forehead against mine while he shakes his head back and forth. But I love it.

*Tooth #8 is making the slightest appearance on the bottom right.

*Some of his favorite activities are eating (seriously, the kid can pack it away), taking a bath, brushing his teeth, chewing on Mama's wallet, taking all the letter and animal magnets off the fridge, climbing on things, banging blocks together, and playing with Sissy.

*He has been a great sleeper lately. He takes a morning and afternoon nap, both anywhere from 1.5 to 2.5 hours, and sleeps a solid 12 hours at night. Wish I could say I was sleeping great too, but now I find myself staying up even later to take full advantage of the down time.

*Nursing is still going strong, although he definitely nurses better first thing in the morning and again before bed. Daytime feedings are hit or miss, it depends on how distracted he is. I will obviously continue until he is one, and then we'll just see how it goes from there. I'm hoping he'll just sort of wean himself. I'm a little anxious to reclaim my boobies, but I also really cherish that time with him so I'm sure I will be a little sad when it ends. We shall see. Made it to 14 months with Nugget.

*He's digging his new big boy car seat, although I miss the whole 'Who cares if he falls asleep in the car' thing. That, and now having to dress him in a jacket every time we leave the house. Those car seat covers are so slick. Guess I'll just have to deal.

Hard to believe I'll be back here in no time posting about his big celebration. But it makes me happy too. He is such a joy in our lives; I can't even remember the days without him. We hoped for him, prayed for him, yearned for him. He's been nothing but a blessing. Love.