AN ENCHANTED GARDEN PARTY.

I've been anxiously wanting to blog about Orelia's sixth birthday party, but our new fall routines are proving to keep us pretty busy. We're getting in the swing of things-with a handful of days of Kindergarten under our belt, along with preschool, ECFE, gymnastics and dance. I know we'll find our new grove soon. But I'm finally able to carve out some time to share my girl's very special birthday celebration.

We started with the theme of a secret garden, steered a bit towards fairies, and alas, mixed the two and settled upon an enchanted garden party. Our new farm was the perfect setting, we just needed to provide the magic.

Celebrating my girl, the day she was born, and the day I became a Mama is pretty special to me. I think this day really captured her magic of being six. It was so "her", which made my heart happy.

She enjoyed planning and creating right alongside me this year, and I think that's the part I love the most.

I shared with the girls a little about the magic of fairies, how to spot a fairy house, and how we have to be so quiet as to not disturb them. I love watching the magic unfold in their little eyes.

We had a little fairy hunt:

And made houses for the real fairies (who we hope will visit us!):

We ate a homemade strawberry cake, which was delicious (minus its slightly wonky appearance):

We opened presents of course:

And parted with fairy treasures:

We played hard, and had some surprise visitors:

And went home with full and happy hearts. Here's to a new year of love and learning, and the magic of being 6!

xo

FIRST DAY JITTERS.

Yesterday my baby girl had her first day of Kindergarten. Our morning was a little rocky, but I got reports that the rest of her day was great.

She had already met her teacher for her incoming assessment, at the open house, and again at orientation this week. That helped tremendously to establish a relationship with her teacher prior to the first day of school.

 

I'm a sucker for school supplies, so we took care of that weeks ago.

My sister came and stayed with my boys on Tuesday (the first day of school for1st grade and up) so that I could take her to orientation. We learned a little more about what her school day would look like and made sure everything was all set.

I'm so bummed I forgot to lay this all out and take a better pic, but we brought her teacher a little "Happy first day of school" gift. I think it turned out so adorable! We filled this tumbler with teacher essentials, including hair ties, chapstick, hand sanitizer, and a sharpie.

***
Wednesday was THE BIG DAY, in which she had to go to school all by herself. Her nerves set in (and mine never left) the night before. We had talked and talked about what school would be like, and I really do feel like we got to a point where she just needed to go and experience it. When you have no frame of reference, it is hard to comprehend.

We made her lunch the night before, packed her back pack, and laid out her clothes. I had her help me pack her lunch, so I knew she would eat what was in there. She was so nervous in the morning that she hardly ate any breakfast, which only added to my worries. (But I am happy to report she ate every last morsel of this lunch, minus two orange slices!)

 

She was keeping herself together pretty well, until the bus rolled through to pick her up. She put on the breaks and was not going. I was anticipating that this would be a hard step, but it was even worse than I had prepared myself for. I ended up having to carry her onto the bus, screaming and crying, and have a neighbor girl sit with her in her seat to block her from following me off the bus. It was the most horrible feeling I have ever felt as a mother, especially knowing that I couldn't get to her for another seven hours. I walked off that bus, straight into my husbands arms, where I sobbed and continued to sob on and off for most of the morning.

 

 

I knew she'd be okay, but a small part of me feared that she wouldn't be, so I sent a quick email to the principal and just asked him to call me if she hadn't calmed down by the time she got to school. He did call, but to tell me that he saw her get off the bus and she was happy and laughing! That made me cry again, but brought me comfort to know that was doing well.

 

Later on in the morning, I got this picture from a friend. It's so funny how the world works, but my friend's cousin lives in my town, and has a daughter going to the same school. That mom happened to snap this pic, my friend saw it and recognized my girl, and then sent it to me. That's Orelia in the window, happy and waving! I was so relived to see that her crying hadn't lasted long.

 

 

The day passed slowly and I watched the clock often, wondering what my girl was up too and counting the hours until the bus brought her home.

We made chocolate chip cookies for an after school snack, and finally it was time for her to come home! She was so happy when she got off that bus, and we talked all night about all the fun things she did in school. I am so relieved that she had a great day!

THE NIGHT BEFORE KINDERGARTEN.

I have been a roller coaster of emotions all day today. I thought I had it together, feeling pretty good about this whole Kindergarten thing. Then we went to orientation this afternoon. And walking around that school, knowing my baby girl was going to be doing it tomorrow without me, well, I had to fight back the tears. I don't want her to see me cry. I don't want her to know how much it hurts to let her go. I want her to see all the confidence I can muster, and I want her to believe that tomorrow is going to be great. Because I know it is. I know she will go and love it, and she will come back to me.

A friend sent me this article a few weeks ago, and I loved it. It's everything I wish I could put into words, but someone did a much better job than I could. I reread it tonight, and with tears rolling down my face, I want to share it here. Because maybe you are struggling with it just like me. Or maybe I want to remember, so I can reread it when my next baby is big enough for school. Either way, its a great reminder that we will all be okay. And even though my girl is growing up and spreading her wings, I still have two little boys at home that need me.

Dear First-Time Kindergarten Mom        

August 13, 2014           

by Jai Wallace Tracy

Dear First-Time Kindergarten Mom,

It’s 12:30 in the morning. Are you still up?
Me, too. I mean, really, who can sleep?
Tomorrow (er, today) it starts. School. The first day. The. First. Day. Of. School. The one that has been circled on the calendar, blissfully hiding behind June and July. It’s really, tangibly here. Staring matter-of-factly at us without the slightest bit of tenderness. It’s here.
His backpack is filled. School supplies bought. (Twenty-four glue sticks? Seriously?) Her clothes are laid out. Honestly, everything is ready to go … except perhaps you. You and me, we’re not so sure about all this. We’re still walking around the house at 12:30 a.m. moving the backpack from floor to the stairs and back again because it needs to be in just the right spot.
And our minds keep reaching back to places that are dangerous to go with achy hearts: The first time we held him. Her first steps. Lost teeth. Bikes without training wheels.
The memories. They are quiet and loud all at once. Tonight they seem so fresh, so vivid. Like that day three years ago with the lady at Target. Remember? The one in the snack aisle? She smiled at us as we were wrestling a bag of Goldfish out of the hands of a screaming then 2-year-old .
“Enjoy it,” she said. “It goes so fast.”
The whole exchange left us mildly annoyed because, um, couldn’t she see this melted-down child? His mom seconds from loosing it? Really, we were enduring that moment, and it could not have gone by fast enough. But it did go. Only to be replaced by another moment. And another. Until one day, we looked up, and the meltdowns were over. We’re not really sure when or how it happened, but he wasn’t 2 anymore. Goldfish were replaced by tablets and neon Under Armour shirts. Princess movies and sleepovers.
And tonight (er, this morning) we find ourselves kind of wishing to be back in Target again and wondering how it had all gone so, well … fast?
That simple question tumbles into another one and another and still another …

The enoughs:
Did I hug you enough?
Did I love you enough?
Did I teach you enough?

The will yous:
Will you make friends?
Will you choose good food?
Will you be happy?

And the what ifs:
What if someone is mean to you?
What if you’re mean to someone else?
What if you forget to go to the bathroom?
What if you miss me so much you cry?
What if I miss you so much I do the same?
What if I blink and you’re 18 and starting your senior year?
What if it really does go so fast?
Just like Target lady said. Ugh. There she is again, smiling and making us paranoid about the fleeting moments of childhood.
“Enjoy it.”
What?
“Enjoy it.”
Enjoy it?
“ENJOY it.”
And then it hits us. Maybe, just maybe, we have missed her point. Maybe the it-goes-so-fast was just tacked on to the heart of what she really wanted us to hear.
“Enjoy it.”
She DID see the screaming toddler and his wits-end mom. And she still told us to enjoy. The crazy moments. The hard moments. The why-me moments. The I-can’t-take-this-a-second-longer moments. They’re not always fun, but maybe that’s not always important? Maybe they can still be enjoyed. Or rather embraced. Met with courageous, open hearts.
“Enjoy it.”
Now we get it. We HAVE to enjoy it. We really don’t have a choice.This first day will happen whether we’re ready or not. This child will grow up. Some moments will fly by, and some will crawl, but they will happen. And some will be more bitter than sweet, but at least there will be sweetness. And because we are moms, we will brave every moment, even the hard ones — no, especially the hard ones. Embrace them. Savor them. Enjoy them.
So when morning comes, and our preschoolers officially become kindergarteners, we’re going to celebrate. Let’s send them off with chocolate chip Mickey Mouse pancakes. Let’s tuck a note in the lunch box. Let’s ride to school, music up and windows down. Let’s take way too many pictures and post them all over Facebook with a caption that says “My baby’s first day of school.” Let’s give a goodbye kiss and a big hug, but save the tears for the car.
And when we do cry, let’s be okay with it. This moment is one of the hard ones. It’s okay to cry.
But let’s not stay there.
Let’s go to Target with two kiddos instead of three. Let’s smile at the mom of the screaming toddler and remind her that kindergarten is just around the corner. Then let’s get drive-thru iced coffee with whole milk this time, and yes, we would like whipped cream and absolutely to caramel because we did something amazing today:
We enjoyed it.
We took on the first day of school, and we enjoyed it.
The end of the day will come soon. We will pick her up, hug her extra hard, and smile when she waves goodbye to her teacher. Then we will hang on every second of every detail of his day. And we might cry again just a little because we will realize how much she enjoyed it, too.
The night before the second day of school, we will go to bed a little earlier. We won’t move the backpack. But we will probably still wrestle with the questions. Won’t we always? Along this journey of motherhood, we will always question. Some of our what ifs will be realized. Others will be left unanswered. But all will be remembered. All will embraced. And we will enjoy it.
So thank you, Target lady, wherever you are. We’ve got to get to bed now. Morning is coming soon, and it’s going to be a good one.

***

SIX: A BIRTHDAY INTERVIEW.

Q: How old are you today?
A: Six!

Q: What do you like to play?
A: Barbies, Polly Pockets, American Girl dolls, ponies, horses, art projects, reading books

Q: What do you like to do with Mommy?
A: Snuggle, shopping, go to the American Girl doll store, reading, getting presents (especially on my birthday!), oh and one more thing! Snuggling!

Q: What do you like to do with Daddy?
A: Probably wrestle.

Q: What do you like to play with Milo?
A: Frozen.

Q: What do you like to do with Otto?
A: Snuggle, build blocks, and what makes me happy with Otto is when he gives me high fives and steps on my head to climb onto the top of the couch. And I also like to help him when he's hurt.

Q: What do you like to eat?
A: Macaroni and cheese, waffles, french toast, yogurt, dumplings, gosh I have like a ton of favorites! Ham and cheese, ham and cheese roll ups, peanut butter and jelly, almond milk, water, soda water, Sprite.

Q: What is your favorite color?
A: Ooh! Pink and orange! And yellow.

Q: What do you like to watch on TV or what is your favorite movie?
A: TV: Sophia, Doc McStuffins, and I like all of the girly shows. Strawberry Shortcake. GI Joe. // Movie: Ooh, this one is a good one! Ariel and Tinkerbell, Pirate Fairies.

 Q: What is your favorite store?
A:  American Girl doll store and the Target where I got Eva (her doll).
Q: What makes you happy?
A: When Otto gives me high fives and he steps on my head.

Q: What makes you sad?
A: When Otto doesn't want to do that. When Milo hits me and bites me and does all that naughty stuff.

Q: What is your favorite animal?
A: Horse, bunny, cat, and I think dolphins are probably one. And butterflies! And dragonflies and frogs.

Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?
A: Have a restaurant with Ava. We'll make mac and cheese and sandwiches.